A number of MRAs have complained that women get preferential treatment at clubs and bars that offer discounts or free admission to women. I always dismissed their resentment as frivolous at best. My knee-jerk reaction was they should be grateful for institutions like "Ladies Nights," which at least improved their odds of actually meeting "a lady" in the flesh. Then I stumbled on this interview with grad student / DJ Trevor Doughtery about why "ladies nights" are downright pernicious, and it got me thinking.
Fact is, in all my years of being an XX person-in-drag, I had never taken advantage of a "Ladies Night" special. In large part, this is because I have always recognized on a subconscious level that because I was not the kind of "lady" these promotions were designed to attract, taking advantage was a violation of the terms of an unwritten contract. I would be cheating the system. Then I fell in with a group of cross dressers who thought such promotions were a fun way to "turn the tables," so I thought, Why the hell not?
One night my SO and I met up with some other "ladies" at a local piano bar that had "Ladies Night" specials on slow Tuesdays. It was not a pleasant experience. In fact, it was the only evening I have ever felt that we, as a couple, were in real physical danger. To make a long, creepy story short, a party of "frat boy" types locked us in their cross hairs, relentlessly imploring us to join their table, and wouldn't take our polite "no's" for an answer. There was a predatory vibe that unnerved us to the point where we wound up "sneaking out" of the back of the club and high-tailing it back to our vehicle as fast as we could.
Any woman who attends a "Ladies Night" does so at her own peril. She is placing herself in an environment where the men who are paying full covers feel that they are "entitled" to her favors. OK, to be blunt? She is whoring herself for cheap drinks (and mediocre entertainment). She is putting herself in harm's way.
No wonder "Ladies Nights" are now banned in five states.
Ladies' Night is a tactic by bar owners to draw in more men. The idea is that loads of women will show up for Ladies' Night and men will follow. It benefits bar owners because it doubles the size of the crowd. A corresponding Men's Night won't accomplish the same increase in business as women don't pursue men as actively as men pursue women. Ladies' Nights use women for profit.
ReplyDeleteI've got to say I've never been to a bar on 'Ladies' Night' either, they tend to be held in places I wouldn't want to go in anyway.
ReplyDeleteNow 'Happy Hour', that's another story.....
You know what they say…if it's free, you are the product.
ReplyDeleteIndeed. 'Ladies' Night' is an advertisement aimed at men as much as it is women. They may as well post up signs saying 'Roll Up! Roll Up! We got drunk women in here!'
DeleteYup. This.
DeleteMy friends and I were just talking about this yesterday! Basically, the guys were complaining in the same vein that having only ladies' nights was reverse sexism - and in terms of getting free booze, they are right. But the whole reasoning behind 'ladies' nights' is so that that there will be an abundance of women for men to hook up with. It's one of those chivalric "privileges" that are not really privileges because they are given by men on their terms (usually on the condition that you are hot.) That being said, I always go to ladies' nights for the free alcohol, but not to hook up with any one, so it's kind of purposeless in a lot of ways.
ReplyDeleteone of those chivalric "privileges" that are not really privileges
ReplyDeleteBrilliant!